If your child is addicted to social media, whose fault is it? | Opinion

I recently read “The Anxious Generation,” an excellent book by social psychologist Jonathan Haidt. 

It’s received a lot of attention for good reason. In the book, he details how smartphones and social media have “rewired” children’s minds and led directly to mental health decline in those young people. 

Haidt stresses the importance of delaying the use of social media and smartphones in general, along with keeping phones out of schools.

But who should be responsible for making sure that happens? The government? Schools? The companies that designed them? 

I think the answer lies closer to home – with parents.

These questions are all being debated right now at a high-stakes trial in Los Angeles. The trial seeks to determine whether social media platforms like Facebook and Instagram are "defective" products that lure teens and even young children to their sites, leading to negative consequences and addiction. 

On Feb. 18, Meta CEO Mark Zuckerberg faced a grilling before the jury, defending the safeguards his platforms already have in place. 

Social media apps are addictive. That's the whole point. 

We’ve all gotten pulled into social media’s lair. Infinite scrolling, auto play, ads, filters – it’s extremely easy to waste an embarrassing amount of time on these platforms. 

That’s how they’re designed. The longer a user stays on the platform, the more eyeballs are on advertisements. 

Observe any public space, whether a restaurant, subway or doctor’s office, and you’ll see people everywhere glued to their phones. 

Yet, there’s something more disturbing when you see a kid doing the same. They should be outside playing or talking with their friends (in person).

“These companies built machines designed to addict the brains of children,” Mark Lanier, a lawyer for the plaintiff, said during opening statements at the trial. “And they did it on purpose.”

Sure. And they are very good at it. 

Is it their fault, though, if people, including children, get addicted? I don’t think so. 

Kaley (as she’s known in legal documents) is a 20-year-old at the heart of the case. She initially sued Meta, Google, TikTok and Snapchat, accusing them of using tactics to addict youths to their products. TikTok and Snapchat settled before trial, leaving Meta, which owns Instagram, and Google, which owns YouTube. 

She says she started using YouTube at 6 years old, and around 9 started on Instagram. Depression and suicidal thoughts were made worse by the platforms, she claims. 

My question is, where were her parents in all this, especially since she started on these platforms at such a young age? 

The outcome of this trial could have significant consequences for the tech companies involved, since there are roughly 1,600 similar social media addiction cases from parents and school districts. The plaintiffs in these cases seek monetary damages and changes to how social media apps are designed.

Some countries are banning social media for teens. Is that necessary?

Governments in the United States and around the world are getting involved in monitoring young people’s social media use. 

Australia made waves in December when it banned kids under 16 from using social media, the most expansive ban of its kind to date.

The Online Safety Amendment Act makes the companies the hall monitors by forcing them to use age verification, whether ID documents or facial estimation through selfies. If they are found in violation, the platforms must pay huge fines. 

The teens and their parents are off the hook. 

Now, other countries, including the United Kingdom, Greece and Spain, are considering similarly widespread bans. 

Some polls show support for similar action in this country.

Do we really want the government getting so involved in our personal lives? I, for one, don’t.

The reality is, parents don’t have to get smartphones for their kids. There are still “dumb phones” out there for basic communication. And if parents can’t resist the pressure of giving their teens a smartphone, then they must take some responsibility to know what their child is doing on the phone. 

The risks for kids using social media are real. Let’s start solving the problem at home. 

Ingrid Jacques is a columnist at USA TODAY. Contact her at [email protected] or on X: @Ingrid_Jacques